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Hi friends….a quick note…..I get a significant number of daily “hits” from people googling “how to seduce your husband/spouse.” But the secret to having a “steamin’ hot marriage” is not just having great sex, it involves having a sustained connection, and a healthy approach to life and love as a couple.
I am aiming (please give me grace if I get behind) to start a Monday series called “Marriage Monday”. This Monday series will offer quick, applicable tips on all sorts of marriage topics that have been helpful for us, including “seductive” ideas. I pray that inspire you to pursue a “honeymoon marriage” and to be launched into all that God intends for you as a couple. Glad you are here! Let’s get to it!
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Praying together. It’s been like spiritual glue for us.
But with interruptions, busy schedules, and exhausted eyes, finding the time and energy to pray together and live spiritually connected is a challenge.
Over time, we’ve discovered that praying as a couple is an art and a science that leads to connection and intimacy.
Prayer as Art:
Prayer as a couple is an art, not a formula. We do not pray through the long lists everyday, but we pray our passions and our loves. That usually involves the same topics on a regular basis as we focus on stewarding the gifts and passions God has put in our hearts (our kids, our relationships, our church, our callings/jobs).
We talk to God, but we also listen for Him. Often, He will give us a word or an image that will be an encouragement for each other. If gardening were our passion, we’d ask God to give us ideas on fertilizer, sunlight, seeds. If it was woodworking, we’d ask God for ideas on design, resources and tools. It’s not so much the topic that matters, as it is opening up every area of our lives to God.
As we pray and as we listen, God melds our hearts together and unity is one of the power results.
Prayer as Science:
Praying together as a couple involves a strategic, near “scientific approach” if it’s going to happen. Life is just too busy for us to stumble into prayer time together, so we plan it.
We have intentionally built our lives on consistent spiritual practices and rhythms, so around 6:50 each morning, after we’ve each had our individual times with God, we come together and pray. To be honest, our prayer time doesn’t happen every morning, because we live in a house with three little kids! But because we consistently aim for it, we find ourselves enjoying prayer together several mornings a week. And some mornings, kids are involved…the more the merrier when it comes to family and prayer!
Prayer as Connection:
Over the past 8 years, our prayer time has become a treasured, set-apart space where we bring our relationships, passions and callings into alignment with God.
If we are struggling, disconnected, or have had a misunderstanding, it’s a time where our honest prayers reconnect us in a way nothing else can.
As we’ve spent years doing this, it has led us into a place of spiritual unity. This unity affects every area of our relationship, leading us into more love for God, and more love for each other.
As I write these words, I’m praying for YOUR marriage as well. My heart beats with fervent prayer, asking that God’s goodness and power would be at work in all our marriages, healing all that is broken, and taking us all further into His beautiful plans for our lives, and for His glory.
Questions to consider:
- TOPICS: What are some passions/loves you and your spouse can talk to God about?
- TIME: What is a consistent time of day you can aim to pray together?
- BABY STEPS: What if your spouse is not ready for spending time together in prayer? What is a “baby step” you can take together? Maybe simply asking if he/she has a prayer request/need, then faithfully praying for that in your own time?
For commenting purposes:
- What have you found to be true when it comes to prayer as an “art” and “science” in your marriage?
- What is something you have learned about praying as a couple that would encourage others?
I’m all ears!! So grateful for you– for this encouraging group of friends!!
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